Of Mice And Men

With Sky News and CNN focussing on the siege of Mosul, increasing sectarian violence in the Middle East and the security services monitoring facebook, it’s the BBC that had the Big Story with The Return of Dangermouse.

The intellerati in the comments section rightly focussed on the issues that matter i.e. that you can’t bring back Dangermouse because the country’s gone too PC. As belicajur puts it:

36.

belicajur

3 Hours ago

This will never happen today as Danger Mouse is too white and Penfold isn't black enough. He'll have to change his name to Danga mouse too...

Stonewall will want them to get married in a church, which will make front page news on The Guardian and headlines on the BBC, after first getting kicked out of a B&B for sharing a bed.

Conversely, Piroflip doesn’t think it’ll be Christianity that will make an appearance.

-11

Comment number 139.

piroflip

1 Hour ago

But in keeping with Dr Who style Political Correctness Penfold will now be female and Dangemouse will have converted to islam.

All this time, Karam is secreting something:

-22

Comment number 42.

karam

3 Hours ago

we can find space to discuss DM but not secrete terror courts where the accused will not be able to hear the evidence put against them.

anyway if its not david jason then its not dm

Relevant comment, Karam. How will we ever know if you’re in favour of secret horror courts if you cannot comment?

Meanwhile, Adrian M Lee has a throwdown for anyone who seeks to censor, suppress or repress his comments about Dangermouse.

-12

Comment number 110.

Adrian M Lee

2 Hours ago

OK, what do I think of Danger Mouse returning? Pants.

Now that I have addressed the subject matter, hopefully my posting won't get censored out (sorry, moderated for being off-topic!)

GIVE US PROPER HYS TOPICS!

Proper topics? I’ll tell you this much: if we tolerate the PCing of Dangermouse, then what will be next?

Write to the BBC TODAY, brothers and sisters, before Button Moon and Fraggle Rock are lost to us forever!

Blue Mercedes

If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my 59 years on this planet, it’s that there’s a simple answer to everything. No issue, no matter how complicated, takes more than 20 minutes for a man with Common Sense to sort out.

One such man is Balloon Rake, who stalks the BBC Have Your Say forum like a vengeful wraith, righting wrongs, solving problems and tutting at scientists. Here’s his take on Korea:

 

As I have said before, the perfect solution all of Korea is that if North Korea and South Korea were to be united as the one country, This would bring peace and harmony and North Koreans would have the same freedom as South Koreans. The sooner this happens the better, nuclear weapons are just a sideshow

 

See? Why didn’t anyone think of that before? Next, the James Webb telescope’s infra-red strap-on:

 

More money wasted by sci-fi nut jobs, this money could be put to much better use. When you have seen one star then you have seen them all. James Webb has far too much time on his hands, at the end of a day a telescope is a telescope.

 

Finally, exiting Europe via our Eurovision entry:

Engelbert Humperdinck must be desperate for cash if he is entering the Eurovison Song Contest, Britains entries over recent years have been drivel leaning towards the manufactured X-Factor rubbish type songs. If Britain wants to win Eurovision then they should a song called "It's Better To Stand Alone (Than Be In The Eurozone)".

And it could be sung by Blue Mercedes

 

Boom! Whilst simultaneously bringing back a much-loved 80’s footnote no less! Jarvis – you may set the dining table in the Long Room for two!