Of Mice And Men

With Sky News and CNN focussing on the siege of Mosul, increasing sectarian violence in the Middle East and the security services monitoring facebook, it’s the BBC that had the Big Story with The Return of Dangermouse.

The intellerati in the comments section rightly focussed on the issues that matter i.e. that you can’t bring back Dangermouse because the country’s gone too PC. As belicajur puts it:

36.

belicajur

3 Hours ago

This will never happen today as Danger Mouse is too white and Penfold isn't black enough. He'll have to change his name to Danga mouse too...

Stonewall will want them to get married in a church, which will make front page news on The Guardian and headlines on the BBC, after first getting kicked out of a B&B for sharing a bed.

Conversely, Piroflip doesn’t think it’ll be Christianity that will make an appearance.

-11

Comment number 139.

piroflip

1 Hour ago

But in keeping with Dr Who style Political Correctness Penfold will now be female and Dangemouse will have converted to islam.

All this time, Karam is secreting something:

-22

Comment number 42.

karam

3 Hours ago

we can find space to discuss DM but not secrete terror courts where the accused will not be able to hear the evidence put against them.

anyway if its not david jason then its not dm

Relevant comment, Karam. How will we ever know if you’re in favour of secret horror courts if you cannot comment?

Meanwhile, Adrian M Lee has a throwdown for anyone who seeks to censor, suppress or repress his comments about Dangermouse.

-12

Comment number 110.

Adrian M Lee

2 Hours ago

OK, what do I think of Danger Mouse returning? Pants.

Now that I have addressed the subject matter, hopefully my posting won't get censored out (sorry, moderated for being off-topic!)

GIVE US PROPER HYS TOPICS!

Proper topics? I’ll tell you this much: if we tolerate the PCing of Dangermouse, then what will be next?

Write to the BBC TODAY, brothers and sisters, before Button Moon and Fraggle Rock are lost to us forever!

A couple of tits

Oh so now it’s Kate Middleton topless is it? Eh?! ALRIGHT is it? Just a bit of HARMLESS FUN is it Kate? NO! It’s a BLOODY OUTRAGE is what it is!

I am seething. You can have a lot of things in this modern ENGLAND. I’ll let you have your Tescos Metros, your internet. I quite like microwaves! But the FUTURE QUEEN with her BAPS. OUT. I’m afraid is a BIG! FAT! NO!

I’m sorry. I need to calm down. Look at this rationally. How did this come to pass?

lewis j cook knows:

“the bb gen were ww3 gen but now their 666 tv sex revolution made offspring falsely assume this 666 tv and tv govt is the way of the new milleneum.” lewis j cook

Are you sure? Are you saying we should have had a war, but instead got caught up with 666 tv sex? And what does this have to do with the Queen’s tits?

“this is the 1964 british perpetuated sex revolution comeing back to haunt the british monarchy who perpetuated this in usa to subvert the usa .” lewis j cook

Oh I see! It was the Royals who attempted to subvert the USA with a 666 tv sex revolution. Who knew they had it in them?! Still, I’m not sure the tone is yet vindictive enough...

“Don't know why we are too surprised the French would sell their own grandmothers for few francs sums up there Country and their culture. We should have left them under German rule.....well they are now anyway!!” wythall wanderer

That’s much better, thank you. BLOODY FROGS! Sell their own grandmothers for an onion they would or a bottle of wine or a bike or a stripy jumper or an accordion, some frogs legs, a tower, some bread or just a big box of Surrender.

The last word has to go to Stevio, though. Because, when our future Queen goes on holiday to France and is snapped with a long lens by a paparazzoid, one issue stands out above them all:

“If only the Muslim community could have vented their anger on a public forum over that 'controversial' film, rather than going on a killing rampage.” stevio

Precisely.